I am so mad at myself because I actually caught feelings for this guy and once again I have been screwed over. The only thing that somewhat comforts me is that I screwed him over first. But wow this really hurts. And I’ve cried over this guy already. I am having a midlife crisis. This isn’t helping. And I’m at my ex coworkers house with a current coworker and I can’t cry right now and I don’t wanna be alone but I wanna be alone so I can cry and I wanna throw up the Whataburger I just ate. I swore to myself I was never gunna let this happen to myself ever again and here I am. Here I fucking am and I could not be more pissed at myself.